Okay so according to the internet this 14-yr old is THE SHIT. And has a “swagger coach” so that he doesn’t make any swaggy missteps. I’d never heard of him until yesterday, and just now I watched a couple videos and I’m not quite sold. What ever happened to Jesse McCartney? That was a true crooner.
Also I will one-up Mr. Bieber: I’m willing to make up to 4 girls less lonely at the same time in the shower and then again in my bedroom.
First they made instant film go away and ruined everyone’s memories. Maybe if Polaroid film was still a thing there wouldn’t be so many girls sexting their teen boyfriends all the time. They could just mail them polaroid nudies using forever stamps and not worry so much about ending up on the internet. Because really, who uses a scanner ever? And when all the millennium babies grow up how will they know what to shake it like without an apt metaphor?
Now Polaroid has named Lady Gaga their new creative director???????????????
Maybe she is the only one with the MONSTER BALLS to return Polaroid to all of its former glory against fierce rivals the Kodiak Bears.
And a penis. Or most of one.
PS! Ladies feel free to mail me your Polaroid instant film nudies (or if you are boycotting polaroid for some reason I will accept all other forms of film as well). Just E-mail me or tweet at me for my address. Also feel free to send your digital nudies to titties(at)totalbro(dot)com.
Hey guys! Remember “tower defense” games? Those are probably my least favorite thing. So I haven’t really had such a favorable view towards browser flash games, since they are an absolute waste of time and for idiots and offer only crappy repetitive gameplay. Same reason I only lasted a month in WoW. Well also WoW costs money and when it comes to things that aren’t too stupid and extravagant to be practical I am a frugal fool.
Oh and don’t even get me started on Farmville.
Anyway I’ve turned over a new leaf now. Some flash games can be fun and worthwhile and innovative. Here’s one called Tuper Tario Tros. to start. It’s like a delicious Cadbury egg, except the cream filling is a game of Tetris in your Super Mario chocolate egg. Basically run around until you can’t go any further and then build yourself a path by switching to and playing Tetris. I think you can also just destroy obstacles by clearing lines too, but I was never any good at Tetris.
ps there is a part where you have to build a castle out of Tetrises I think but it was too hard so I gave up.
Pretty much every day I read several thousand delightful blog posts and watch at least 400 youtube videos. I’ve been back and forth up until now about just how much content I wanted to feature at The Total Bro Dot Com that I didn’t actually create myself. There’s (maybe) a fine line between sharing tons of super-awesome amazing things and inundating anyone who sometimes reads this with stupid shit that only Ben Lockwood likes. At least, there’s some kind of line.
What I’m trying to say is that I came up in favor of posting every single thing that makes me chuckle, so you can now turn to Total Blog several times a day (I hope) for a curated set of delights as well as any updates to projects that I’m currently working on myself.
Sorry to be so existential, but enjoy the video that made me rethink my entire life.
I’ve never listened to an audiobook. I’m not exactly sure how I feel about the idea of having to travel at someone else’s pace, and listen to a single voice mediate my imagination.
All that is going to change now that I’ve discovered the Tor Story Podcast. Maybe. I haven’t listened to any of them yet, but the latest one is steampunk so you know that I will be popping boners all day in anticipation.
It seems like a pretty new thing over at Tor.com and hopefully it will turn out to be really good. It looks like the one before this is some sort of Lovecraftian treat. I’ve been mulling over trying to write some horror ever since I read a fuck-off sized Lovecraft anthology last summer.
(via Boing Boing)
